Home Personal Development Relationships Saying Goodbye: How to Know When to End a Relationship

Saying Goodbye: How to Know When to End a Relationship

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Couple Relaxing

Knowing when to end a relationship can be difficult. Whether you’re talking about a romantic relationship or a friendship, these connections can form very deeply and work their way into our identity.


You’ve been through a lot together but there’s got to be a reason that you’re questioning your relationship, right?



Even if you still love that person, that doesn’t mean that the relationship should go on. Continue reading this article to learn more about when you should put an end to a relationship.


When Small Things Add Up to Big Things


Something terrible doesn’t necessarily have to happen in a relationship for you to start noticing it’s coming to an end.


It could be one thing after another after another or the same small thing over and over again. If you notice these things are wearing you down, it’s time to take a closer look at the relationship.


As relationships age, it is easy to fall into a certain type of comfort and start taking each other for granted. The things we once thought were unspeakable, that we would never do to that person, we do them and vice versa.


When Deal-Breaker Behaviors You Didn’t Know About Show Up



If you find out there are deal-breaker behaviors going on and you didn’t know about them at the beginning of the relationship, it may be time to say goodbye.


People are oftentimes very good at hiding their true nature until they have safely embedded themselves into your life. Not only that, they might have started these bad behaviors during your relationship.


Some of the common things that might be deal-breakers in your relationships.


  • Hidden criminal record
  • Unmentioned child
  • Undisclosed divorces
  • Addictions (Current or past)


And there are any more you can add to the list depending on what you’re willing to live with.


Check Out This Video About When to End a Relationship


I found this amazing video by Brendon Burchard about when to leave a relationship and if you don’t already follow him, you totally should. His story is amazing and I love his message.


I want to go through some of the important points he went over below and give my take on them. You should also watch the video. He has a great way of explaining things.



Yeah, I know — the thumbnail is a little harsh with “When to quit on someone”, but it is what it is.


My Take on the Points in the Video About When to End a Relationship


I’ve ended my fair share of relationships and it’s not always been fun but I agree with what Brendon said in the video above. I am going to explain it my own way but I’m really glad I found the points in the video.


1. When There is Abuse


This is a major one and I don’t only think physical abuse is a good reason to end a relationship, but I believe mental and emotional abuse is a good reason to end a relationship.


And that goes both ways. If you’re abusing someone or they are abusing you — get out. You don’t want to be that person.


In this article, they actually go into 6 different types of abuse:


  • Physical
  • Sexual
  • Verbal/Emotional
  • Mental/Psychological
  • Financial/Economic
  • Cultural/Identity


If you’re experiencing any of these types of abuse — leave the relationship now.


Repeat Failed Discussions


If you’ve spoken to this person about a specific issue of extreme importance multiple times and have shared back and forth about your feelings and needs, and you just can’t get it together, it might be time to go.


When you can see that neither of you is going to give on the matter and it’s making you both miserable, why continue to stay and have the fight?


I don’t believe you should just bail on someone because they are “negative”. There are a lot of people that say you should do that and I love that Brendon points out that you don’t need to bail on someone because they aren’t 100% positive and happy.


3. Repeated Neglect


If the person in the relationship never does their part in the relationship, it’s time to say goodbye. If you’ve made the requests, had those discussions and they keep failing over and over — that’s it. There’s no reason to let people make you feel useless.



4. Repeated Lies


Worse than neglect, if your partner, friend, employee — whatever. If they keep telling you one thing and doing another, it’s time to tell them cya.


If you aren’t sure if they are lying to you, you might want to take a look and see if they are lying to others. If they are lying to other people, they are lying to you.


5. No Appreciation


Even if people say they appreciate you but you don’t feel appreciated, that’s not a healthy relationship. Talk to that person and tell them how you feel and if they still don’t come around, don’t stay in a thankless relationship.


It’s sad when you’ve invested a lot in a relationship, but that’s not a good reason to stay in a relationship.


When to End a Relationship – Only You Know


While we’ve talked about when to end a relationship, you’re the only one that really knows when it’s time to go but the above things are definitely signs that you need to strongly consider removing that person from your life.


It’s never easy to remove someone from your life, especially if you feel like you owe them something. But if it’s not working for you, it’s probably not working for them and it’s time to let things go.


What are your thoughts?


Have you dealt with things like this before?


Feel free to leave a comment. I’d love to hear from you.


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